Anxiety Has a Pattern—And That Changes Everything

Have you ever had your check engine light come on while driving? One minute you’re fine, the next, your mind starts spiraling. What’s wrong? Is it serious? Is my car about to break down?

You get to the mechanic, and they say, “Oh—it’s just a loose gas cap.” Nothing major. Just that.

The light’s still on, but now that you know what’s causing it, it doesn’t feel so scary anymore. You’re still driving the same car, in the same body—but the fear softens, because you finally understand what’s going on.

That’s exactly what happens with anxiety.

Anxiety Feels Unpredictable—But It’s Not

One of the hardest things about anxiety is how overwhelming and random it can feel. But the truth is, anxiety follows a really predictable pattern. Once you know what to look for, things start to make a lot more sense—and feel a lot more manageable.

The cycle usually looks like this:

1. Something triggers you—an upcoming deadline, a difficult conversation, a mistake.

2. Your brain assigns meaning to it—I’ve messed up, I’m going to fail, this is bad.

3. Your body reacts—tight chest, racing heart, shallow breath.

4. You try to avoid or fix the feeling—overworking, overthinking, shutting down, etc.

5. The pattern repeats—and the anxiety gets reinforced every time.

   
   

This is something I talk about often in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), because naming the pattern is often the first step in shifting it.

Once You Can Name It, You Can Change It

Imagine you’re in the middle of that anxious spiral—your thoughts are racing, your body feels tight, everything feels too much. But then you remember, Wait, this is just my pattern. That small moment of awareness gives you space to do something different.

In therapy, I help you build tools that support exactly this—learning to talk back to the inner critic, practicing calming techniques, and gently challenging the thoughts that keep anxiety going. You don’t have to get rid of anxiety altogether (none of us can!), but you can learn how to understand it, respond differently, and stop it from running the show.

Clarity = Calm

Anxiety thrives in the unknown. But when you can recognize the signs, understand what’s happening inside your body and mind, and respond with a little more clarity, the fear starts to fade.

The situation might still be the same—but your relationship to it changes. And that changes everything.

Curious if you’re stuck in the anxiety loop?

Let’s talk. Click here to learn how therapy can help you feel more calm, clear, and grounded—no matter what life throws your way.