Hey, it’s Candice here.
A while back, I took my four-year-old to his first sports practice. As I stood on the sidelines, one little boy immediately stood out. He was the smallest on the team — noticeably smaller than everyone else — yet he was running faster than any of the other kids. It wasn’t even close.
Then I overheard his dad lean down and tell him that because he was smaller, he would need to work harder than the others to keep up with their speed.
As an anxiety therapist, my ears immediately perked up.
In that single moment on a sunny field, I was watching the power of mindset play out in real time — the same dynamic I help clients navigate every day in my practice.
What I Saw as an Anxiety Therapist
There were other kids on that field who looked stronger. They had longer legs and every physical advantage you might expect. But this little boy — the smallest one — was the fastest.
Not because his body was built for speed, but because his mind was.
His dad’s words planted a clear belief: that being smaller meant he would have to put in more effort. That belief shaped his effort. That effort shaped his performance.
This is exactly what I see with anxiety.
So many thoughtful, high-functioning adults carry thoughts like “I’m not enough,” “Things don’t work out for me,” or “If I’m not perfect, I’m failing.” These thoughts don’t just color how they feel — they directly influence how much effort they’re willing to invest and how persistently they show up.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is so effective because it helps us become aware of these automatic thoughts and gently examine whether they’re truly accurate or helpful. When we shift even one of them, it can change not only our mood, but our actions.
The smallest kid on the team wasn’t running faster despite being smaller. He was running faster because of what he believed about being smaller.
That’s the quiet power of mindset.
The Hopeful Truth
Here’s what stays with me from that day, and from years of sitting with people working through anxiety:
Your thoughts are not just background noise. They are powerful drivers of what you’re willing to do.
When we carry beliefs that fuel anxiety, we often limit our own effort without realizing it. But when we begin to notice and gently shift those thoughts, something important starts to happen. We become more willing to try. We persist longer. We show up differently for ourselves.
This is where real, sustainable change begins — not in one perfect breakthrough, but in the willingness to go back to the drawing board, try again, and build a new way of relating to challenges.
As a therapist, I am continually reminded that the mind is an incredibly powerful tool. The way we talk to ourselves can either hold us back or quietly propel us forward.
You don’t have to be the biggest, the strongest, or the most naturally gifted to move forward in a meaningful way. You simply have to be willing to examine the thoughts that are shaping your effort — and choose ones that help you keep going.
That is where the real power lies.
References
Bandura, A. (1997). Self-efficacy: The exercise of control. W. H. Freeman.
Dweck, C. S. (2006). Mindset: The new psychology of success. Random House.
Beck, J. S. (2011). Cognitive behavior therapy: Basics and beyond (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.
Nakao, M., et al. (2021). Cognitive–behavioral therapy for management of mental health and stress-related disorders. BioPsychoSocial Medicine, 15(1), 16.
